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An Update About My Habits

January 15, 2020 by Jacob Sensiba Leave a Comment

Over the past few weeks, I’ve tried implementing habits that would make a positive impact on my life.

In the following article, I’m going to review those habits, what I’ve learned since then, and how I’ve adapted to make them work for me.

What I was doing

I have to tell you, I wasn’t doing much. I had every intention of exercising, meditating, and journaling.

Exercising took place here and there. I have a pull-up bar in the doorway to my bedroom, so I’d do 5 every time I walked by, but there was nothing consistent.

I didn’t have a regular regimen that I followed.

Honestly, meditation didn’t happen much either. There were two things I did that may or may not count. They had meditative properties, but it wasn’t something I consciously thought of as meditation.

I hung in my inversion table for 5-10 minutes. There was no intention of focusing on the breath or anything like that. I sort of just let my mind wander.

I laid on my “neck tension relief” device for 5 minutes. I was more intentional about keeping a steady breath but wasn’t particular about going back to the breath when my mind wandered.

I journaled very inconsistently. Again, nothing regular.

What I found out

I stink at establishing habits, but I also figured out a system that can work for me. Having a two-year-old makes it a little more challenging, but this goes back to my point about being intentional.

I wanted to exercise, journal, and read in the evening, and meditate in the morning. That schedule didn’t work for me. At the end of the day, I a) didn’t have enough time to fit those things in and b) was too tired to do so.

All of these habits are beneficial; I know they are. However, they all take different shapes and forms, and you need to make adjustments based on what will work best for your personality and your schedule.

What I’m doing now

I made a few adjustments to my schedule and in my practice.

Exercise and meditation take place in the morning – I exercise first, wind down for 5 minutes, and then meditate. Additionally, while I meditate, I have a journaling app open (Journey). If something comes to mind that I would like to explore more, I make a note in that app and then bring my focus back to the breath. Doing both of these activities in the morning holds me accountable and makes sure I get them taken care of. Incorporating the notes provides me with prompts that I can journal on later.
Journaling and reading in the evening – when I journal, I go through my day. I recount the good and the bad and try to find lessons hidden in everything. Once I’ve gone through the day, I go to those prompts I created that morning and write at length about those. After I journal, I read. Typically it’s for 15-20 minutes. It really all depends on how tired I am.

I am very pleased with this new set up, but it’s still new to me, so I will provide an update in about a month for my next “Personal Reflection” piece.

Conclusion

When we set goals and/or set out to make positive changes in our lives, it’s important to stay malleable.

Just because this thing worked for so and so, doesn’t mean it’ll work the same for you. We are all different, so we need to approach habits with the same attitude. Find out what works for you and stick with it, but don’t be afraid to make adjustments as life changes.

My Goals for 2020

January 1, 2020 by Jacob Sensiba Leave a Comment

Now that we’ve turned the calendar to another year, another decade, it’s time to figure what goals we would like to set.

Specifically, in this post, I’m going to go over the goals that I’m setting for myself, why I’m setting that goal, and how I’m going to put a system in place to achieve that goal.

What are my goals for 2020?

Get out of debt – Bought a house in 2019 and bit off more than I could chew. The divorce also threw a wrench in my financial planning.
Save for retirement – I’ve put my savings on hold for the time being due to poor financial decisions that led to the debt, etc.
Incorporate a meditation practice – I’ve harped on it and studies show how much it helps. I need to do this.
Journal every day – When I remember to journal, those are generally good days. I need to do this consistently.
Read every day – Reading can only help me, so why wouldn’t I do it more? I’ll learn something new and it’s shown to provide some meditative benefits.
Spend more dedicated time with my son – I’ve found myself over the last month or so having my phone out more than normal. I mean, I’ve had quite a lot going on with work and mentally, but that’s no excuse. He deserves better.
Exercise regularly – it’s good for my body and my mind. It’s a must.

Typically, when you’re setting goals, you should be very specific. You’ll notice, that I wasn’t. I get more granular with my goals in the systems section.

My systems

Getting out of debt and saving for retirement we can lump into one system, as they both revolve around finances and me reigning in my spending.

Until April, this will be incredibly challenging, as I am currently paying my mortgage on my house and the rent for my apartment.

So until I get my house rented (I have tenants set to move in, in April), I’m kind of stuck. Once that happens, however, I’ll have the debt repayment pedal down to the floor.

Simultaneously, I’ll contribute $20 per month to my retirement account, just to get in the habit of doing it again. Start small, enforce the habit, then increase the dollar amount.

Meditation

Of my goals, incorporating meditation practice should be relatively easy. I know my preferred style – I’m not one to sit pretzel-legged on a cushion. I lay down on the floor, on my back, which some relaxing music playing.

The hard part is a) making the time for it and b) doing it consistently. To start, I’m going to set my alarm for 5 minutes earlier than normal.

5 minutes might not seem like a lot, but if I wake up 5 minutes earlier, that gives me 5 minutes to meditate. If I do that consistently for the next, say three weeks, those extra 5 minutes won’t seem that, and I can scale it to 10 minutes.

As I noted in last week’s article, when forming a habit, you have to start small and then scale up.

Reading

Reading every day. This is a must-do for me. It’s good for my mind, it’s good for my soul, it’s good for everything. I have a great many books on my list, but they will all fall into a specific genre – finance, philosophy, religion, or biographies.

The first one will help with work. The last three will help with life.

Every day, before bed, I’m going to read for 15 minutes. That’s my starting point. Once I get into the habit, the amount of time I read will increase.

Spending time with my son

Spend more dedicated time with my son. This is an easy one. Just stay off my gosh darn phone.

Keep it in my room or in the kitchen. Not in my pocket, where I can easily access it. Put the ringer on and leave it alone.

If it’s an emergency, someone will call and I will hear it.

This will also eliminate a distraction, so if he goes to bed for the night, I can immediately pick up a book without getting sucked into the social media black hole.

Exercise

Exercising every day. I read recently in a book about the Dalai Lama that exercising your mind is more important than exercising your body, so I’ve put that on the back burner.

I have a pull-up bar in the doorway to my bathroom and I do 5 pull-ups every time I go in, but that’s not enough dedicated, consistent time for exercise.

I think doing it in the morning makes the most sense. I’m too tired in the evenings to exercise. The question is, do I do this before or after meditation?

Probably after, as I need my mind at ease when I meditate.

So instead of waking up 5 minutes earlier, I’ll start by waking up 20 minutes earlier. Dedicated 15 of those minutes to exercise and the remaining 5 for meditation.

Living with Anxiety and Depression

December 11, 2019 by Jacob Sensiba Leave a Comment

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post about my personal experiences with anxiety and depression, and how those mental illnesses affect your finances. (See article here)

This week, I’d like to talk about what it’s like living with these two illnesses. Before I do, however, I’d like to show a graphic from Anxiety.org that sum the symptoms pretty well.

The most challenging part about having anxiety and depression is that no day is the same.

Sometimes, I can’t even tell they’re there. Although, to be honest, those days are very few and far between.

Other days, my anxiety is in overdrive, which is exhausting. I’m jittery, constantly worrying about things that I needn’t worry about, and I have a big ball of negative energy that’s ever present in my stomach.

I have to say, though, the days when my depression is dominant are the toughest. The only thing I want to do these days is stay in bed and sleep.

Isolate myself from everyone, and just deal with it alone. Which is counter intuitive because social interaction is one thing that helps the most.

Recent changes

My medication changed. I don’t know if I noted it in that prior post I alluded to earlier, but my previous prescription wasn’t doing the job.

I’ve been on my new dose for two weeks now. My doc gave me two medications. One to treat my depression and another to treat my anxiety.

So far, so good. My depression isn’t gone by any means, but it’s definitely reduced. Though, I will say, there are days when it flares up due to certain triggers.

My anxiety is, somewhat, better. The biggest positive is that I’m sleeping better, which is vitally important.

The biggest drawback I’ve noticed is something I didn’t expect.

A temper was passed down to be, and sometimes, it’s really bad. Over the past year or so, my depression has been so prominent that it’s muted my anger.

Guess what? The new medication is doing its job and the anger is making its way back.

So what do I do? Change my medications again? Or do I learn techniques to manage my anger? Techniques that will allow me to feel my emotions without feeling controlled by them.

Yes is my answer.

Meditation, relaxation, and exercise. The two former I’m incorporating into my morning routine. The latter will take place in the evening.

My new morning routine will go as follows: (all while listening to relaxing chillstep)

Wake up 45 minutes before I have to get ready (shower, shave, change, leave)
Start with 5 minutes with my neck/head tension reliever
10 minutes in my inversion table
15 minutes of meditation
15 minutes of Tai chi
Turn on some classic 90s/00s hits to get ready to

My exercise routine changes everyday. At least 30 minutes each day.

Day 1 – Elliptical

Day 2 – Stretch

Day 3 – Pull-ups and lunges

Day 4 – Stretch

Day 5 – Resistance bands and jumping jacks

Day 6 – Stretch

I haven’t done enough to take my mental health into my own hands. Sure, I’m seeing a therapist and I’m taking prescription medication, but that’s not enough.

I need to move my body and relax my mind.

I’m also reading a book about the Dalai Lama right now, and it’s quite interesting. It’s giving me a different perspective on how I can go about my day and the mentality I can incorporate into my daily life.

How it affects my finances

Depends on the day. If it’s a depression day, not too much. Like I said, I want to isolate myself on these days and I generally won’t buy things to make me feel better.

If it’s an anxiety-ridden day, that’s a different story. Food is my go-to when my anxiety is running high. That negatively affects my finances.

Bottom line, just make sure you are taking care of yourself. Whatever that looks like for you. Also, make sure you have a “person”. Someone you can vent to. Someone that checks on you.